If this is how the British make breakfast, no wonder people hate their food.

Theatrical Release Date: 09/01/2006
Director: Mark Neveldine & Brian Taylor
Cast: Jason Statham, Amy Smart

“Crank” is the age-old story of a hitman who can only keep from succumbing to a poison in his bloodstream by keeping the adrenaline flowing. Lucky for him, he has a busy day of rampaging through the streets of Los Angeles to kill the guy who poisoned him.

Now, I didn’t make it to the theaters for this supposed action-packed thrill-fest last year but the DVD wandered into my mailbox so I gave it a shot. And as a fan of the action genre (being born with a y chromosome and electing the Governator), I was happy with the results of “Crank”.

The action is fairly continuous, using a frenetic and energetic camera style, and there are some fun moments like sex with Amy Smart while dozens of Chinese folk watch and enjoy.

Sure, there isn’t too much complexity to the story or character development but that’s not what the filmmakers were going for and not what the audience should expect. This is about a guy kicking ass, smooching a hot chick and literally fighting to try and save his life.

That doesn’t mean I can forgive that when it comes to rating the film but keep that in mind if you’re looking for a cinematic diversion on a rainy afternoon. I’m going to give “Crank” a 3 out of 5. Since they didn’t have a big budget, there aren’t any huge explosions which I’m a big fan of.

However, using what was available and being creative with their camera placement, the filmmakers did provide some interesting shots and I was pleasantly surprised to see that the film delivered on the premise and can only hope that Statham remembers not to do any more films by Uwe Boll.