Here are the results of this year’s predictions. I got 16 out of 24 correct for 67% (7/8 major awards). As bad as the nominees were, some of the winners are quite possibly worse. There should be a disclaimer prior to the show that winners are determined by those who were able to market themselves the best, not by their actual merit. I’d rant about the show but it was so boring that I don’t even know where to begin … so I’ll just end. The list of winners (and my failures) is below:

● Best Picture: “The Artist”

● Directing: “The Artist” Michel Hazanavicius

● Actor in a Leading Role: Jean Dujardin in “The Artist”

● Actor in a Supporting Role: Christopher Plummer in “Beginners”

● Actress in a Leading Role: Viola Davis in “The Help”
– Did Win: Meryl Streep in “The Iron Lady” –

Want proof that these awards go to those with the most friends? Here you go.

● Actress in a Supporting Role: Octavia Spencer in “The Help”

● Writing (Adapted Screenplay): “The Descendants” Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Nat Faxon & Jim Rash

● Writing (Original Screenplay): “Midnight in Paris” Written by Woody Allen

● Foreign Language Film: “A Separation” Iran

● Animated Feature Film: “Rango”

● Documentary (Feature): “Paradise Lost 3: Purgatory” Joe Berlinger and Bruce Sinofsky
– Did Win: “Undefeated” TJ Martin, Dan Lindsay and Rich Middlemas –

Serious error here. “Undefeated” is a marginal doc.

● Documentary (Short Subject): “The Tsunami and the Cherry Blossom” Lucy Walker and Kira Carstensen
– Did Win: “Saving Face” Daniel Junge and Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy –

● Art Direction: “Hugo” Production Design: Dante Ferretti; Set Decoration: Francesca Lo Schiavo

● Cinematography: “The Tree of Life” Emmanuel Lubezki
– Did Win: “Hugo” Robert Richardson –

This was a travesty. A TRAVESTY.

● Costume Design: “Anonymous” Lisy Christl
– Did Win: “The Artist” Mark Bridges –

Damn, I knew Hollywood didn’t understand that Tuxedos were invented a a long time ago.

● Film Editing: “The Artist” Anne-Sophie Bion and Michel Hazanavicius
– Did Win: “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” Kirk Baxter and Angus Wall–

● Makeup: “The Iron Lady” Mark Coulier and J. Roy Helland

● Music (Original Score): “The Artist” Ludovic Bource

● Music (Original Song): “Man or Muppet” from “The Muppets” Music and Lyrics by Bret McKenzie

● Sound Editing: “War Horse” Richard Hymns and Gary Rydstrom
– Did Win: “Hugo” Philip Stockton and Eugene Gearty –

● Sound Mixing: “Hugo” Tom Fleischman and John Midgley

● Visual Effects: “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” Joe Letteri, Dan Lemmon, R. Christopher White and Daniel Barrett
– Did Win: “Hugo” Rob Legato, Joss Williams, Ben Grossman and Alex Henning –

● Short Film (Animated): “The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore” William Joyce and Brandon Oldenburg

● Short Film (Live Action): “The Shore” Terry George and Oorlagh George